Motherhood: Enjoying the Journey

Motherhood is hard. But the biggest lesson I've learned in the area of motherhood is that *my* attitude has everything to do with how hard or easy things are. It's not fun to clean toilets or to change diapers or to be "mommy" all day long, unless you look past the "chore" part of it and see God working in and through our lives. I've been the "victim" of mommy-syndrome before ... camped there as the Victim for a couple of years as a matter of fact. As long as I felt unappreciated and undervalued and that I had so much to "bear" for the sake of my family, I was miserable. I was miserable because I focused on how hard it was and I focused on all the negatives (like the messes and the long days and, and, and ... the list goes on <grin>). Not only was I miserable, but I made life pretty unhappy for my husband too.

The best gift we can give *ourselves* is to enjoy the journey. If we can enjoy life as a mom, wife, keeper of our home, teacher, etc ... hard and messy as it is, our families will benefit and enjoy life too. There is truth to that saying "if mama ain't happy, nobody's happy." LOL!

This gift of enjoying the journey is simply a matter of renewing our minds and retraining our thoughts. We all know our situations aren't going to change (it'll still going to be hard and messy work), but we can choose to change our attitudes about our lives and the work we do as moms. I love the phrase "It's not what happens to you that matters, it's how you respond."

When my husband comes to tell me he has to go out of town *again* for work, I have two choices. I can dwell on how much harder and more miserable my life will be for the next x number of days or I can choose to respond cheerfully and supportively. I've also learned that my responses can't just be superficially cheerful or supportive while I continue "stewing" and sulking in my heart. This is true for any struggle or challenge in my life as a wife and mother. It really is a choice to be happy and enjoy life.

I am far from perfect (my kids and my husband will gladly confirm this <grin>) and I don't share these things to hurt or criticize. Rather I share them to say, hey, God has given us His joy and His peace. He has made a way for us to be free from self-pity and misery in our hearts. It's up to us to choose life ... to choose His way and all He's set before us to freely enjoy.

It is helpful to know that other mothers struggle too. We need each other. And we need to keep pointing each other to our only Hope, the Lord Jesus Christ and all He's given us through His sacrifice.

We can't compare ourselves to one another ... either judging ourselves better or worse than another. Although we can be inspired by the gifts and the peace and the joy of others as we travel along <soft smile>. We do need to keep our eyes on what God has given us to take care of. Really, that's a big enough job all in itself, isn't it? <big grin>.

-- Nancy M.